Song: Let the Mystery Be | Article: Avoiding Resentment |

Friends,

I had stitches out of my foot on Monday. I'm much more mobile, although I still cannot carry anything from one spot to another.

I've been able to get into the attic, where my rolling chair means I can do everything for quilting except ironing. And I last a little bit ironing while balancing on one leg! Who knew the skills I'd learn?

-Liz

An Unknown God

These are the weeks I don't like being a lectionary preacher.

Acts 17:22-31 is kind of fun, Paul makes fun of the Athenians and their altar to an unknown God. Of course I learned this as his wisdom, taking something they believed in, and turning it to show, "oops, really you were worshiping my God". Which.

Well, I'm not really a fan anymore of making fun of other people's religions, and the idea that we'd propose that "really your religion is my religion, you just didn't know it" is quite... colonial? Disdainful? At least its unkind.

And John ! I rarely know what to do with John. I'm not a philosopher. There are of course some great one liners, but I'm always anxious I'm taking them out of context because the context is... complicated. John 14:15-21 is a perfect example of this. We prove our love by keeping the commandments (v. 15)? Well not "the" commandments, but "my" commandments... which sends me back to the greek, which I didn't actually study.

The world can't see the spirit of truth, because it doesn't know God (v.17)? But we (who?) we know God who abides in us. Well I believe God is both within us and beyond us but is that what the writer of John is saying? In any case I think God is in everyone, whether or not they believe it... (Which, see above, I'm telling people that my way is the right way whether they "get it" or not. Sigh.)

And is this last bit about the resurrection, the world will no longer see Jesus, but we will see him (v. 19) in God, I'm in Jesus, Jesus is in me (v. 20). Interesting take on resurrection but I don't know how to make that argument. Is John about a spiritual not a physical resurrection?

The Psalm (66) then goes on to say that God tests us with burdens, and good news, God relieved us of the burdens he put on us.

I remember part way through seminary being stuck in the place of wondering, do I really believe all this? I've been in that place many times, wondering what on earth this faith is about. The scriptural support for a loving God is there, but so is the idea that God has favorites, that God is hardening people's hearts, that God doesn't really play fair.

In my seminary doubting, and in each time of doubt, I end up back in the Christian fold. I have settled firmly in the camp that the Bible is a collection of writing by people who are trying to describe the faith in God. The original texts are stories and rationalizations made by people of deep faith. The later edits and re-workings are done by people (individuals) who want make points about the people (plural) of God. My faith is driven fully by the experience of Jesus telling me "you are okay" at the lowest point in my life, and that belief that each of us is "okay" drives my reading of this family-history book that is the foundation of our faith.

One of the times that my faith was revived came from a search for scriptures about care of immigrants. I decided to post one on social media each day. Six months in I took a pause to say: I really believe this. I really believe in this faith that calls us to action to treat our neighbors well. To love our enemies. To welcome the stranger.

Was that God, who abides in me, rearing their head to say "wake up, this is your faith"? Was that the holy spirit using scripture to speak to me? Was that me, trusting that by keeping God's commandments, or Jesus' commandments, proving I am loved?

Perhaps like the Psalmist, I felt a burden lift from me. It felt like God could hear me (again). My annoyance with God's inability to fix our world was in abeyance. Or perhaps this was months and months of an unknown God suddenly becoming known to me?

While I'm mostly a person who wants the facts, I've come to settle my faith in place of mystery. I can be confident that John believed, without understanding what he trying to tell me. I can find comfort in the promise that God will abide in me without knowing what that actually means. I can love the stories and the rationalizations without the most ridiculous details threatening my faith.

Maybe Paul was onto something, this idea that there is an unknown God that it is worth believing, trusting, in.

How are you grappling with scripture this week? Reply to this email to let me know what's happening. ​
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"Everyone's wondering...." Iris DeMent is a singer-songwriter that I love. Here is one of my favorites "I think I'll just, let the mystery be." (2:48)

Sojourners Magazine has had a serious of articles on how the chaos of this time, and our despair, can affect how we know ourselves. I really appreciated this article about Nelson Mandela: I won't let resentment determine who I become.

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